3 Things I Had to Unlearn to Start Loving My Body Again

For years, I lived with the belief that my body was something to fix, shrink, and control. I thought that if I could achieve a smaller size, a more toned appearance, or a certain ideal, I would finally feel at peace.

But the reality was far from that. The more I pursued perfection, the further I felt from true wellness. Healing did not come from doing more—it came from unlearning.

The process of unlearning was not easy. It required me to challenge the deeply ingrained messages that had shaped my relationship with my body. I had to release control and embrace a new perspective—one rooted in grace, balance, and holistic healing.

If you have ever felt like your body is a project in need of constant improvement, I want you to know: You were never meant to live that way.

Here are three fundamental beliefs I had to unlearn in order to cultivate a healthier, more loving relationship with my body—and how you can, too.

1. Unlearning That My Body’s Worth Is Defined by Its Appearance

For much of my life, I equated my worth with how my body looked. I believed that acceptance, confidence, and self-respect were reserved for those who met societal beauty standards. I assumed that once I reached a specific weight or shape, I would finally feel content.

However, the pursuit of external validation is an endless cycle. No achievement—whether a number on the scale or a certain clothing size—ever brought the lasting peace I was searching for.

This belief is deeply embedded in our culture, where beauty is often tied to worth. Yet, when viewed through the lens of faith-based wellness, the truth becomes clear: our value is not determined by appearance, but by the inherent dignity of being created in God’s image.

"You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you." — Song of Solomon 4:7

True self-worth is not something to be earned; it is something to be acknowledged and embraced. The body is not an object to be perfected but a vessel to be honored and cared for with compassion, nourishment, and respect.

Letting go of unrealistic standards allowed me to approach wellness from a place of care rather than criticism. It shifted my focus from how my body looks to how it feels and functions.

2. Unlearning That Hunger Is Something to Suppress

For years, I viewed hunger as a sign of weakness or a lack of discipline. I believed that suppressing my appetite meant I was in control and that ignoring hunger cues was a necessary part of maintaining my ideal weight.

However, this mindset is not only unsustainable—it is damaging. Hunger is not a flaw; it is a natural biological signal.Suppressing it does not lead to health; it leads to depletion, stress, and imbalance.

The body is designed with intelligence. Hunger serves a purpose, signaling the need for nourishment and energy. Ignoring these signals disrupts the body’s natural rhythms and can contribute to exhaustion, hormonal imbalances, and a strained relationship with food.

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." — 1 Corinthians 10:31

By unlearning the belief that hunger should be controlled or ignored, I began to trust my body’s signals. I stopped fearing food and started seeing it as a source of nourishment, energy, and well-being. This shift was a crucial step in restoring balance and adopting a holistic approach to health.

3. Unlearning That Health is Defined by Control

For a long time, I believed that health was about strict discipline—meticulously tracking food intake, following rigid exercise routines, and maintaining unwavering control over every aspect of my lifestyle. I assumed that the more structured and precise I was, the healthier I would be.

However, true health is not about control; it is about stewardship, balance, and grace.

Rigid control often leads to stress, burnout, and disconnection from the body’s natural rhythms. Faith-based wellness teaches that health is not about forcing the body into compliance but about caring for it with wisdom and intention.

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." — Psalm 139:13-14

When I released the need for control, I experienced a profound transformation:

Food became a source of nourishment rather than a source of stress.
Movement became joyful rather than obligatory.
Wellness became a holistic, faith-centered journey rather than a rigid set of rules.

The pursuit of health should never come at the expense of mental, emotional, or spiritual well-being. It is not about achieving perfection—it is about cultivating peace, vitality, and sustainable balance.

A New Perspective on Wellness

If you have spent years battling food, your body, or your sense of self-worth, you are not alone. The path to healing begins with unlearning the false narratives that have shaped your perspective and embracing a new, more compassionate approach to wellness.

You were never meant to fight your body. You were designed to flourish in it.

By shifting the focus from control to care, from criticism to compassion, and from perfection to peace, you can step into a deeper sense of well-being, freedom, and faith-based healing.

If you are ready to rebuild your relationship with your body and embrace a holistic approach to wellness, I invite you to take the next step.

Join The Nourished Woman Experience

The Nourished Woman Experience is a 5-day guided journey designed to help you heal your relationship with food, your body, and your faith. This experience provides practical tools and faith-based insights to support a more balanced, intuitive, and grace-filled approach to wellness.

To learn more and join the waitlist, click below:

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Healing begins when we choose to unlearn the beliefs that no longer serve us. The journey may not be simple, but it is always worth it.

The content of this blog is for educational purposes and is not intended to offer personal medical advice. You should seek the advice of a qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read in this blog.